Welp, it feels real now. Last night we went to our Childbirth Preparation Class at the hospital. I don't know what it was, but I felt like I was on the verge of laughing out loud the entire time. Maybe it was being in a room full of people going through the exact same aches and pains as me. Or maybe the fact that all the men were shivering and all the women were fanning themselves. Or maybe it was how all the moms were trying to get comfortable in those plastic chairs. Or, it might have been the how all the mom's got up at least once during the lecture to go potty. I went twice, but I was smart enough to go before the break, talk about a rush! A few things I know for sure were funny.
One. When we arrived seeing all these couples (girls with huge bellies, and husbands carrying pillows), roaming around the lobby and halls-totally lost.
Two. The teacher dimmed the lights, turned on James Taylor, and told us to partner up. Isn't that the way we got into this situation in the first place? Matt quickly chose me as his partner. Phew. Then she directed us to face our partner, moms put arms around dads neck, lean in, and sway. It turned into a full blown Junior High Dance. It was great! I would have known the $95 dollars included a dance, I might have worn a little glitter.
Three. Getting to strange positions in front of a room full of strangers.
Four. Matt almost fainting and turing ghostly white during epidural video. What?! I thought it would be the part when the show the BABY COMING OUT OF "you-know-what". Nope. It was the needle. At least I am a little bit at ease about that part. I don't care if he is passed out for that part of the whole experience, as long as he is awake and helping me through the rest. Poor guy. not.
Five. The mom and her 15 year old daughter next to us. I have never seen ANYONE so into something as that mom was into the HEE HEE WHOOOs. She was closing her eyes and swaying her daughter around in circles.
Six. Watching the men try to act comforable listening to the women talk about boobs, and mucus plugs, and ginas (I refuse to use the real word on my blog), etc. I saw some guy nodding off until the lady dropped the V- word. Way to get attention back!
Seven. The teacher handed out Lifesavers. Told us she has a visual lesson for us. You guessed it. After were done sucking on those little miniature cervix 's we had such a good idea how they dilate and get thinner. Thanks the the visual lesson.
Eight. Taking the whole HEE HEE WHHOOOO breathing serious. Come on! I felt like I was in a movie, but I wasn't. It was real life. My life. And I am having a baby and I have to do the HEE HEE WHOOOO thing. Too strange.
Did you go? Any funny stories? I wonder if anyone has gone into labor while in class. That would be sweet and well worth the $95.
ps. next week I might muster up the courage to ask someone to take a picture of us at the class. That is a must. Do I dare?!
Friday, April 18, 2008
Childbirth Prep. Class
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11 comments:
i love your life. it cracks me up, seriously.
pictures, please.
pictures are a must. Your class sounds way more entertaining. Ours was a waste of time. No breathing exercise (never used it during labor) no funny positions... just talk to me if you get to watch a breastfeeding movie from the 70s. Now that was interesting!!
Do you remember when we were about 14 and we went to yoga with your sister?! And you walked out to laugh because you got such a kick out of "child's pose."
At our class they were discussing birth control options after baby. One lady shared that a month after her cousin had a baby she was pregnant again with TWINS! So she ended up having 3 babies under the age of 1! In a room full of VERY pregnant ladies and their spouses-the groans and sounds of fear could not be stopped.
Christian and I got the giggles in our class. They were talking about nesting and that day we had a guy named Nacho at our house painting. Christian leaned over to me and whispered, "We don't have to nest. Nacho is nesting for us." I died... like literally had to leave because I was doing the "don't want to laugh so you shut your mouth and it comes out of your nose instead" laugh.
Also, we did a weird exercise where we had to take a clothespin and put it on the very tip of our earlobe... she said it was like having a contraction and we had to breathe through it for a minute. Too funny.
At the end, we got to go around and say which characteristic of our spouse we hoped the baby got. It was so cute to hear everyone's responses.
My favorite thing about our class was being around a bunch of other women who completely validated the way I was feeling-- even though I didn't learn a lot of new information in the class I was glad I went just so that John could see that I wasn't just being crazy and eggagerating how rough pregnancy can be on your body. In fact, there were some VERY big whiners in our class and I think it gave John a lot of appreciation for how easy my pregnancy was (for the most part).
Funny stories? Not really. But on the last day of our class we had a "party" where everyone brought a treat to share and we "graduated" complete with a diploma walk and everything. I felt like I was in kindergarten all over again.
LOL! That sounds hilarious! Definitely have someone take pics of you!
LOL! That sounds hilarious! Definitely have someone take pics of you!
thank you for the laughs. that was hilarious.
We too really couldn't take it too serious. For some reason I was always annoyed with the way Aaron was helping me breathe. I think it had something to do with me being pregnant, and Aaron trying to be funny. One time we were practicing hard labor and breathing to get through it. We were sort of laughing, and the teacher stole my water bottle thinking it was hers. We started laughing so hard, and she came up to us. She hit me with MY waterbottle and says, "You must already have your epidural." I'm not sure we stopped laughing until we left class.
haha this is hilarious. I love it.
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